There were some archeologists excavating Mozart's tomb. They broke in to find him rubbing out all his music. When they asked him what he was doing he replied I'm decomposing!!!

A famous conductor passed away but his agency kept getting calls from people asking to speak to him. "I'm sorry, he's dead," was the standard reply.

After some time, the receptionist noticed that it seemed to always be the same caller, so she eventually asked him what was going on.

The reply: "I was in his orchestra, and I just like to hear you say that."

Sitting in heaven, three of classical music's greats, Mozart, Bach and Beethoven, were arguing over which of them was the greatest.

"I believe that I am the greatest," said Mozart, because I was the most prolific composer ever, though I only lived a short life.

"Well I believe that I am the greatest," replied Bach, "for my music was most in touch with God. When I wrote my Mass in G minor, the Lord himself inspired me."

To which Beethoven responded, "No I didn't!"

An old musician was walking in a street when he saw a little shop with the sign: “Musical pets”. With great curiosity, he walked in and saw a beautiful parrot: big, elegant and with a green, yellow, red and blue plumage. He was really impressed and decided to buy it.

The dealer said: “Good choice! It’s $10,000”

“$10,000!? “— Replied the old man — “Why is it so expensive?”

“This beautiful parrot can sing all Mozart Arias by heart!”

“Really? Amazing but it’s really a bit too much for me “ when he said these words he noticed another parrot, a bit smaller than the other and less colored. “It must be cheaper,” he thought so he asked the price to the shop owner.

“Oh, That parrot costs $20,000”

“$20,000!“ - said, the customer shocked “Why?”

“Besides all Mozart, it can sing also all Wagner and Verdi Operas....

“Astonishing, but it’s really too much, listen that little, ugly, all black parrot there in the corner it MUST be cheaper, right, how much is it?

“Well, that is $100,000”

“What?! exclaimed the poor man, totally upset - "What can it do?"

"Oh, actually it can do nothing but all the others call him MAESTRO!"